There’s plenty of proof that your love story is worth sharing. That’s the theme of this series of posts. How can I be sure? Because I have a hunch your story contains some of the same elements as the epic, iconic love stories.
In my last post, I wrote about the first element of any great love story…the meet cute (Click here to read). Today’s post is about another critical element you and your spouse will relate to:
Somewhere along the line, most new relationships have some form of opposition to their being together.
It can be a disapproving parent. In Titanic, it was Rose’s mother. You are not to see that boy anymore, Rose. I forbid it. In The Notebook it was both of Allie’s parents. Her father made it clear to her, He’s not suitable for you, Darling.
It can be external circumstances. In Good Will Hunting, Skyler was moving across the country to attend Stanford University. Will had never been out of Boston, and seemed unwilling to make such a big change. Their circumstances were threatening to pull them apart. In You’ve Got Mail, Joe Fox put Kathleen’s bookstore out of business – a major relational barrier!
It can also be internal issues. In Good Will Hunting, Will had a profound fear of intimacy and abandonment, which was caused by his extremely abusive childhood. It quickly became a major barrier in their young relationship.
Here’s the interesting thing about opposition:
It creates tension, which makes you wonder if the relationship will work out, which makes the story compelling and inspiring.
What about the two of you? Did you experience any resistance from family, friends, external circumstances, or internal issues? If you did, then it makes your story real…and powerful.
We usually think the presence of opposition and tension means God is NOT writing our story. We think perfect circumstances, and perfect peace through those perfect circumstances, are the ultimate indicator of God’s will; but sometimes the opposite is true.
Take the incarnation, for example. An engaged teenage virgin, living in a small Jewish community, telling her fiance’, mother, and father she’s pregnant…by God. I wonder if her parents ever believed her story, or anyone else for that matter…besides Joseph.
Yep, that’s tension.
Tension often means God is up to something great.
Debbie and I had plenty of opposition in the early stages of our relationship. We met in high school, and we came from different social groups; so I think we raised a few eyebrows because nobody saw it coming. We didn’t have disapproving parents (if we did, they hid it very well!), but our main opposition came from our external circumstances after high school.
What I mean is, we had a difficult time figuring out the logistics of our future. I was going to college in Florida and she was attending college in Pennsylvania. When your young and in love, 4 years is a very long time to manage a long-distance relationship.
She was very supportive of our future in the ministry, but she had a professional career of her own she was pursing in veterinary medicine. How was that all going to work out?
Maybe some of you know what I’m talking about when I say we felt like our circumstances were pulling us apart. Were we really meant to be together? There were days when it felt like the universe was conspiring against us, but love and passion for each other kept us together. And certainly…God was keeping us together.
He was writing our love story…and it included tension.
I think every good love story has tension brought on by the opposition, whatever form or fashion it comes in; because real love always has an enemy in this world – internal or external.Every love story experiences opposition, because real love always has an enemy in this world. Click To Tweet
Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying every couple that hooks up is meant to be together. Whether a couple is meant to be together (especially in the early stages of the relationship) is up to them to discern. What I am saying is that in the physical universe in which we live, real love will be opposed in one way or another along the way.
And the opposition that you have faced doesn’t disqualify your story. Instead, its what makes your story great…and worth sharing.The opposition that you've faced doesn't disqualify your story. Instead, its what makes it worth sharing. Click To Tweet
In conclusion, I’m asking you to think about the opposition that existed in your love story. Have a conversation with your spouse about the obstacles you’ve faced and how far you’ve traveled together. My hope is that you’ll consider sharing your story in the near future. I’ll be sharing the “how” of sharing your story in future posts.
For now, remember what Jesus said,…
“What God has brought together…” (Mathew 19)